Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Gym People

People who go to the gym all have one thing in common: They care about their bodies. There is nothing wrong with this. I would classify myself into this category of individuals. Calling people who go to the gym "gym people" is kind of like calling people who shop at Wal-Mart, "the people of Wal-Mart." It almost gives them a title that over represents them. Wal-Mart people care about saving money. There is nothing wrong with this. I consider myself someone who likes to save money. I don't know about you, but I have seen some strange coo-coos at Wal-Mart. Although this does not generalize people who shop at Wal-Mart, this is indeed what I think of when I hear the phrase "people of Wal-Mart."

Thus it is with the term "gym people." Even though most people who work out at a gym aren't self-centered and meat heads, we think of those people when we hear the phrase.

Our experience at the gym yesterday proved this to be true.

First, let me describe what happened to Matt. He was changing in the bathroom, and noticed two wallets inside the toilet tank. (The toilet he was using was broken, and he was trying to fix it.) Matt immediately went and told the trainers on duty, and they confiscated the wallets. Now, this can only mean one of three things. 1. Somebody stole two wallets, took out the cash, and ditched them where nobody would find them. 2. Somebody stole two wallets and wanted to come back for them later. 3. Two people randomly wanted to keep their wallets safe in a disgusting and unlikely place, which seems pretty unlikely. This is in OREM, UTAH for crying out loud! Yes, it might be more safe here than in Detroit or Houston. But keep your wallets on you people! Just because "gym people" might care about their bodies does not mean that they care about other people's property!

After getting started on my lifting regimen (a much-needed one after China and New-York trip of not working out at all) I notice a girl looking at me weird. It was as if she was trying to get me to look at her. She had short, blond hair and was very tan. She was also very fit. She looked as if she could have been a fitness model. Good for her. I didn't stare, but I did notice her looking at me funny. Every machine I went to, she went to the one right beside me for a little while. Coincidence, probably. Then, as if she was fed up with something, she lifts up her shirt so that everyone around her could admire her much-defined abs. Only problem was that I was the only person around to see it. Look, girlie, if you're trying to find a relationship with someone who cares about your body like you want them to, or any relationship at all, I am not the person to try to impress. She walks right by me and struts like a runway girl. What surprised me most was that there weren't any boys around. Do I look like a lesbian?

Gym people--the stereotype--are probably so desperate to show off their bodies that they will go against (hopefully) their better judgment on who to try to lure into their shallow sexiness. Wow.


  1. Haha that is hilarious!!! And weird. :)

  2. I work at a gym, and yes, there are all manner of gym people weirdos. I have my favorites (sky high wind shorts anyone? Yes, I'm talking to you old man with a beer belly...and don't forget to tuck in your too-tight muscle shirt). He's a strutter too.

    I am so envious of the people who are serious, AKA there for the right reasons. It's really easy to spot those on the prowl. And those who are there just so their egotistical boyfriends can show them off. The gym is a great place to people watch!

  3. My sides hurt from laughing at this post!! You've had an exciting few days!

  4. You rock Amber! I love this!