What You Say Means a Lot

Its amazing how when someone tells you that you are something, you become that person, even if what they said wasn't necessarily true. It might even be true, but maybe you didn't think it was. If someone compliments you on something that you are doing well, or about who you are, you become that person that they see in you.

I want to urge you to say out loud good things about the people around you. Make these remarks honest and sincere. Don't be the person who assumes that this girl "already knows she is pretty" or "talented" or "smart" or "nice" or "good with people." She may not know that she is, and once she hears it from someone, she will start to believe it, and become more of the person that you admire. And for those of you who are women, or know one really well, you will know that women do need reminding, because they tend to forget the good things about them every once in a while.

I recently had an experience like this. On more than one occasion, I was told something that boosted my self-confidence by a few different people. I had no reason not to believe it, especially since these different people didn't interact at all. "By the mouth of two or three witnesses...."

Since then, this particular trait that I apparently have has become a point of focus in my life, and I want to be that person even MORE. Because I am conscious of this trait, I am actively developing it, instead of it being accidental. I'm starting to like myself more, and be even more happy than I was before. (My life is so good that sometimes its hard to imagine being any happier.)

 

Ironically, I also have noticed that when my husband compliments me on something (which he so often does...thank you baby!) I am beginning to resort to what I would feel when my parents would compliment me on something; the whole they're-just-saying-that-because-they're-my-parents/husband. I'll tell Matt about something nice someone said to me and he's like, "I TOLD you!" So for those of you who have a husband or father or friend that you are close to, take it to heart when they say nice things about you. They are being honest about what they observe, and they want you to believe in yourself because they believe in you. Yes, you really ARE that beautiful/talented/smart/kind/good with people.

 

I guess my message to myself and to everyone is to be more vocal about your positive observations about people. It will build your relationship with that person, and it will help you feel good for making someone else happy. Also, take compliments with grace. Nobody likes to go out of their way to say something nice to someone and have them get all awkward and antsy, especially if that person loves you very much.